I was brought up in a faceless town No education and no name Always restless, never settled down Had to learn to live in shame Through my dreary world you walked one day Love was in the air Your face took my breath away Speechless, helpless, drawn and quartered I have seen you standing on the street Looking so good, no one can compete People tell me that you're only friends But I can't bear it, on you my life depends It's so hard when your whole past is black To go back where you were before You once got me off the beaten track Now my future's insecure In my solitude I hear your voice You are my every dream No resistance, ain't got no choice Speechless, helpless, drawn and quartered I have seen you standing on the street Looking so good, no one can compete People tell me that you're only friends But I can't bear it, on you my life depends Through my dreary world you walked one day Love was in the air Your face took my breath away Speechless, helpless, drawn and quartered I have seen you standing on the street Looking so good, no one can compete People tell me that you're only friends But I can't bear it, on you my life depends I have seen you standing on the street Looking so good, no one can compete People tell me that you're only friends But I can't bear it, on you my life depends

I thought it was a joke when you called me up And said you needed ironing There were creases in your facial lining Won't you have a little rest when they turn out the lights A nice cup of tea and you'll be feeling alright Don't fret, you'll recover yet you'll see So keep on sending dirty postcards back to me Back to me, back to me I thought it was a lark when you phoned my dad And told him that you'd have to catch the measles You're flesh was being ripped to shreds by weasels Won't you have a little rest when they turn out the lights A nice cup of tea and you'll be feeling alright Don't fret, you'll recover yet you'll see So keep on sending dirty postcards back to me Back to me, back to me T'was on the Norfolk Broads We were punting one day You received a nasty bump on the head And you've never been the same since needless to say How I wish it could have been me instead I wish it could have been me instead I thought it was a prank when you wired the Pope To say you'd a vision of an aardvaark Who was perpetrating ghastly deeds with St Mark Won't you have a little rest when they turn out the lights A nice cup of tea and you'll be feeling alright Don't fret, you'll recover yet you'll see So keep on sending dirty postcards back to me Back to me, back to me

Amaze your friends Such high and low Out in the pouring rain Where freedom runs And darkness grows Talk about anything You're in alone You'll be the perfect hostess, the modern wife You and your calming rose, take 'em out at night Don't ever get excited, let them all believe You are the perfect hostess You are the perfect hostess Amaze your friends You're lots of fun Smiling at everyone Just be yourself You hold your own Talk about anything They're going home You'll be the perfect hostess, the modern wife You and your calming rose, take 'em out at night Don't ever get excited, let them all believe You are the perfect hostess You are the perfect hostess You'll be the perfect hostess, the modern wife You and your calming rose get them out at night They never get excited let them all believe You are the perfect hostess (modern wife) You are the perfect hostess (modern wife) You are the perfect hostess (modern wife) The modern wife (perfect hostess)