Oh Evan Williams
You dirty-faced, scruffy-kneed boy

When I was poor and lonely
I'd put you in a jelly jar
Put you in the pocket of my old trench coat
And sneak you into the bar
Now I got plenty of money
But that doesn't mean I don't love you
When the endtimes fall and the zombies crawl
I'm gonna drink you out of my shoe

I like to lose my mind
Get blurry sloppy boozy and blind
Like to put my hand on a pretty girl's knee
And I got four dear friends to help me

Oh Jameson
You dignified, righteous young man

I don't care much for god
No matter what set of rules you got
A-protestant this and-a catholic that
To me it's just diddly-squat
But I love a good rebellion
And I love to hear a fiddle slide
So when the rebels croon 'bout that rising moon
I'm standing right here on Jamie's side

I like to lose my mind
Get blurry sloppy boozy and blind
Like to put my hand on a pretty girl's knee
And I got four dear friends to help me

Oh, Maker's Mark
You sweet little temptress you

I remember you and my daddy
Sittin' in the easy chair
He'd rip open your wax, pour a finger or two
Then he'd sit in the dark and just stare
But I know that he was thinkin' 'bout something
Maybe something sad from long ago
But when he'd tuck me in, with that sad little grin
I'd think maybe I don't wanna know

I like to lose my mind
Get blurry sloppy boozy and blind
Like to put my hand on a pretty girl's knee
Pretty boy's knee
And I got four dear friends to help me

Oh, Lagavulin
You lovely lady of the lochs

There's a forest burning somewhere
And the moon is red as blood
But then I look in your eye and the fairies come
And I'm squishing my toes in the mud
I'm dancing on the stones of the oracle
I'm kissing in the waterfall
I'm under your spell, in a wishing well
I'm a-lost and I don't care at all

I like to lose my mind
Get blurry sloppy boozy and blind
Like to put my hand on a pretty girl's knee
Pretty boy's knee
And I got four dear friends to help me
Four dear friends to help me
Four dear friends to help me